Okay, so the last month has been an eye opener. I want to be honest with you all, so this is my account of a few weeks of struggle. It was not pretty, but this journey is never perfect. It comes with both good and bad, and this is my account of what was a very hard to encounter few weeks. Don’t get me wrong, it was also filled with positive moments where I smiled and had some fun, but the little devil of competition prep came out to play more often than I would have liked. It has taken me quite some time to reflect on this one, so please forgive my lateness (yet again, bad Teeghan!) I even contemplated not saying anything at all, but I made a promise to myself, to always be honest. This week’s blog post is just that – honest.
I would also like to preface this post with the following… we all have the same 24 hours in the day. This experience so far has taught me to use them wisely. If you have certain goals in mind, you should be putting every effort to spend your time on those activities that will help you, not hinder you to reach them. Once you make that decision, you also need to ensure you remain true to yourself and your goals. Don’t back down for anyone; my motto strongly remains ‘always ensure you are in this for you, and never give up’.
So why have these past few weeks been so much harder than all of the rest you might be wondering… well, I was faced with a decision that could have broken my spirit. I have faced many an obstacle before, but none like the obstacle that is the decision to compete when you’re afraid of not being ready, afraid of not meeting expectations and really afraid of making the wrong choice. I struggled with that, more than I ever thought I would.
You see, prep second time around has been vastly different from the first time I competed. Physically, my body just isn’t responding as quickly as it had the first time and this is something I can not control, something I must just accept and learn to work with. MUCH easier said than done if you ask me! It is never a matter of whether I WANT this, I do. It drives me everyday. However, just because my mind and heart are strong and truly want to achieve something, does not mean the body follows suit.
I find myself in the gym so so much more than last time. This is my day (pictures of schedule), and yes, I am one to write lists and plans (haha) They make me feel better.
Every week it changes based on the time I am expected to be at the office. This example happens to be the “get up at 3am” version… The cardio is going up, the carbs are decreasing, and the struggle to ensure I get it all done in 24 hours, ready and rested to do it all again the following day, is real and tough stuff. I can tell you now, even though it is written down and I am meant to stick to it, I ALWAYS end up on bed, head on the pillow, by 2130 most nights. Sleep suffers because who goes to bed when it is daylight outside!?
I know what you might be thinking… you wouldn’t think now is the time to test out your body’s responsiveness, right? This time around, it is necessary. You can’t sit here and tell me to throw in the towel for Season B 2015, and try for 2016… I won’t have it. Doesn’t sit right with me, and I am not one to ask myself a year down the track… “what if?” I have set my mind to INBA Australian Titles and I am not shying away. I will be stepping on that stage with the best package I can bring, knowing I threw everything I had in the ring despite the challenges the body offered me.
Look, there are no excuses really. You can’t expect to achieve the greatness you set yourself if you are not willing to throw aside your excuses and just get on with it. I am not saying there are times when things crop up that you don’t expect etc, I am talking about those daily moments you try to talk yourself OUT of doing something… the “I will just do it tomorrow”, or “but I have already worked so hard today”… The idea of standing up on the world stage, next to the best of the best always gets the better of me – I want to be there, and no matter how long it takes, I will make it. Looking back on these times, I want to be able to say I gave it my everything. That includes right now, despite the challenges I have faced, and will continue to face this prep, I am not standing down, and I am not giving in.
On a side note, I find myself losing creative flair with my food. Just can’t be bothered, eating boring dull food and I don’t seem to care. Palettes are funny and unpredictable during prep! It’s back to the basics for me, and I don’t seem to be missing what you might think is more “delicious”. Sure, there is occasionally some sauce thrown in, but to be honest, I don’t need it. I think my palette has given up on the fancy and is craving prep food. Might be a reaction to how I structure my life at the moment. When you make something a priority, like serious exercise and gym time, the body adjusts and craves what it needs, not what you might THINK you want. I’ve been listening very carefully to these signals, and there has been no “eat chocolate, you need sweets” like last prep… body says “give me chicken, turkey, fish rice, oats and greens”. It’s refreshing. I am extremely thankful! Still have a hankering for peanut butter though 😛
There are certainly positives that go along with the devil that can be comp prep though. I am finally seeing my vision (which I thought was never going to be possible). It’s a surprise, so no peeking! I want to keep this one under wraps until it is all complete – you will all get to see the vision come to life on stage, I promise. I will certainly share it with you, and will dedicate a blog post to the making of once I have hit the National stage in October. This way, should you have an idea yourself, you can see that it is entirely possible to create what you want if you just believe you can and are not afraid of experimenting!
I am making time to see those I care about too, something I really struggled with last prep. I manage my time far more effectively as this is my lifestyle now, it is not a one off – and the best way to ensure I stick to my goals, and stick to my lifestyle, is keeping my life balanced. I met up with two gorgeous ladies, who are also in prep for September and October competitions. We spent hours drinking tea (yes, TEA!) and just chatting. Catching up on life. It refreshed my mind, refreshed my spirit, and gave me the courage to share these experiences with you all. For that, I must thank them both 🙂
I will continue to keep you updated as best I can – time is pressing this close to competition, but like I said – same 24 hours. Prioritise your time right, and see what it is you can achieve!
-Teegz xx
Teeghan Louise 